Turning over a New Leaf ...

It's that time of year again ... the end of the old and looking forward to the new. My mother recently told me that she hates New Year's Eve, but couldn't say why. I really think it has a lot to do with the fear and foreboding that many people feel as 12 fresh new (unknown) months loom over us.

I often remember back to being a young student in my Junior school in England. Our school day would always start with every class assembling in the all-purpose gym. Our head-mistress, a very aloof and formidable woman who was aptly named Mrs. Loveless, would sit high up on her raised platform, behind a huge desk (at least it seems huge in my memory!) Peering at us all from behind her gigantic glasses she would tell us every year that this was the time to "turn over a new leaf".

Now, remember that in Junior school we were aged 6-11 years of age ... and I heard her use this expression (plus the accompanying lecture) every single January!! I hadn't got a clue what she was talking about, and I remember thinking about physically turning over leaves in my hands - but certainly couldn't see how this would make me a 'better person'. Mrs. Loveless would always talk literally as well as figuratively way over our heads - usually addressing the staff more often than us! She would sometimes go on and on about how "delightful the dawn chorus was this morning" ... totally ignoring the fact that almost all of 'her' children came from the rows upon rows of small 'council houses' which surrounded the school. We felt lucky to see the odd scrubby tree and perhaps a few twittering sparrows - and certainly had no idea what a "dawn chorus" was!! (How on earth did such people get into the important work of education???)

Anyway, it is now time to turn over new leaves, and like many others I want to get fit, and have pledged to actually get onto my treadmill every day. How long I stay on it, or even how fast I walk remains to be seen. But, I will try! (This 'poor' treadmill is a magnificent state-of-the-art machine that does everything except lace your shoes for you ... and has been glaring at me for months for abandoning it!)

Whichever leaf you choose to turn over, I wish you every success!! But, more importantly I wish you a very happy and healthy New Year!

See you in 2008!

Cure ... Part 2

Do you recognize which famous Christmas book this piece comes from, and who it refers to?

"Oh! but he was a tight-fisted hand at the grindstone, ... a squeezing, wrenching, grasping, scraping, clutching, covetous old sinner! Hard and sharp as flint, from which no steel has ever struck out generous fire; secret and self-contained, and solitary as an oyster."

Amazing imagery, isn't it ... "solitary as an oyster" and "hard and sharp as flint". Listening to these words you conger up an image of someone you certainly would not choose to spend any time with! If you guessed the book is 'A Christmas Carol' you'd be correct, and of course Charles Dickens is describing the main character of the book, Ebeneezer Scrooge.

Dickens wrote 'A Christmas Carol' in 1843, and he gave public readings of this book all over Britain, Paris and in the United States. His first reading took over three hours, so he reduced it to about 80 mins. and this was the version Ray and I enjoyed last weekend.

We had never been to a 'reading' before - although I've always wanted to - so, when I saw this performance advertised I persuaded Ray to come with me. It was a wonderful evening!!!! We both enjoyed it so very much, and it certainly chased away some more of the Bah Humbugs that were still hanging around me!

These performances are sponsored by the CBC Radio, and occur annually all across Canada in December featuring guest readers from the CBC along with local 'talent'. All proceeds go to local charities, and the one we attended benefited the local Food Bank and the "Christmas Cheer" programme which provides necessities to those in need.

There were 5 readers, and a choir sang appropriate Christmas songs and carols between each reader. All the readers were very good, but the last was Dan Lessard - a CBC programme host who was absolutely riveting! He didn't just read, he almost acted his part - such was his enthusiastic rendition of the end of the story when Scrooge reforms and sees the error of his ways. Who would think in this age of continual sensory stimulation, and over 160 years since it was written, a simple story could keep such a large and varied audience so attentive? Such is the power of Dickens' writing - and the talent of the readers.

A fabulous experience ... I think I might be actually getting into the spirit ....!!

Cure for the Bah Humbugs!

This morning was my usual volunteer time to help at our local food bank, and I spent my time helping people with no jobs, no money, no food, poor health and not the best living arrangements. It is always a humbling experience, but given my present mood - today it seemed even more so.

How can I continue feeling cynical about Christmas when I see how much food is pouring into the food bank - donated by our very caring community? How can I feel sorry for myself when I see so many others in such dire straights ... picking through our free winter coat rack for something warm to wear? I am humbled.

They say that when you volunteer, you receive much more than you give, and I certainly can't argue with that. One of our best family Christmases was the first time we went and served dinner to homeless men at a local Salvation Army Shelter in the city. The five of us went, not really knowing what to expect. Oh, little did we know that we would come away with the warmest glow we have felt in years!! We repeated this experience for many more years until we moved north, and it was always rewarding ... but, never again did it match that first time. Only at Christmas do the men get served their meal (usually they line up at the counter to pick it up.) The men were amazing, and surprisingly many were intelligent and very chatty! Of course there were the eccentrics and those with obvious mental health issues, but they were all polite and very grateful. Hats off to the wonderful Salvation Army workers who help them 365 days a year!

So, yes, I am feeling much less of a scrooge tonight. It's just too bad most of us only feel this generous one day a year - then I wouldn't have to go begging for money to buy food for the food bank from the local municipal councils when spring rolls around!!

Oh well, 'tis the season, might as well join 'em!Bye!

Christmas Musing ...

I probably should start by confessing that I have never been a big fan of Christmas. This used to give me great angst, I felt I was a freak! Everyone else was going around singing dopey Christmas songs, and saying how much they were looking forward to the BIG day.

I have no warm and fuzzy memories of Christmas as a child - I used to receive a few new books as gifts, placed on the end of my bed by Father Christmas whilst I slept. The day itself passed by like most others ... it must have done, because apart from the new books I really can't remember much else about it.

I actually didn't start feeling like a freak until my own children came along. Then, the pressure was on - we had to create THE most perfect day for these precious children of ours. So, I baked, decorated and shopped until I dropped (as they say). My now-grown kids say they have wonderful memories of Christmas, so we must have been successful .... but, for me, it was just a whole lot of stress!!! Yes, I am a card-carrying, bah-humbug, Scrooge!

I started to stop feeling like a freak in my 40's when a good friend confessed that she hated Christmas. Wow, suddenly I wasn't alone! We compared notes, and found we both just found the whole thing totally filled with anxiety. Now, I should explain that neither of us had strong religious beliefs, and I'm sure those who have can sail through the season swept along by carols and Bible stories of babes in a manger, shepherds and wise men.

These days Ray and I have minimized everything to do with Christmas, and that has helped a lot. Our family has cut the gift-giving right back, and goodies are more likely to be bought than home-baked. Decorations are simply a freshly cut balsam tree and some pretty green boughs placed around the house. Living isolated in the woods as we do, it is quite easy to avoid a lot of the hype surrounding the season - so long as we don't turn on the radio and TV. Yet, even so, I still feel a bubble of dread inside me as the 25th approaches ... maybe left-over from long ago - who knows? Many people now confess that Christmas is not their favourite time ... lost loved ones are missed more, lonely people feel more lonely, depressions feel much worse, suicides hit their peak. Why is this???? Do other holidays in other faiths cause this same mass reaction????

I did most of my shopping for gifts on-line this year - had them delivered right to my door, and loved it!! But, yesterday I had to venture out into the shops for some last minute things - my first time this season! I witnessed:

- people walking around stores in a daze ... bumping their carts into each other, not seeing ... minds on a million other things ...

- a frantic, tired-looking woman on a cell phone talking to someone as she perused the aisles ... I heard her say quite angrily into the phone, "I'm trying to find a present for YOU!!"

- very frazzled shop assistants trying to help very frazzled shoppers ... and there's still 14 days yet to go!!

But, it's not all bad ... luckily there are now many like myself, who have come out of the closet, owned up to their feelings, and refuse to get caught up in all the hype Christmas brings. As I look out my window I see the snow falling gently, adding to the already 2 feet on the ground, and I think how thrilled the children will be when they come - great tobogganing this Christmas - yeah!!! I look forward to all the family being here. My daughter, daughter-in-law and sister-in-law will all turn up with food to keep us all happy, and everyone will pitch-in with the chores ... gifts will be opened, the children will squeal with delight, hugs all round, love in the air ... and lots of photos will be taken of the happy moments.

But, for me, the day after Christmas will still be the best ...

Bye for now!