I saw a very interesting documentary the other day. Basically it featured many groups of people of all ages, getting together every morning in various public parks and laughing. Yes, laughing. Loud, raucous laughter! It was quite funny to watch, and you found yourself smiling at them, but their intent was not to make YOU smile, but to make themselves feel better.This was Laughter Yoga. An amazing technique started in Mumbai India, by Dr. Madan Kataria 15 years ago. Apparently, he was writing an article entitled "Laughter - The Best Medicine" and decided to test it on himself and a few friends. It seems the body cannot tell the difference between real laughter and laughter on command, and the benefits are amazing!

"Studies have shown that laughter has a profound positive impact on both our physical and mental well-being. The benefits range from reducing anxiety and stress, to oxygenating our blood and organs, to improving circulation and releasing endorphins. Laughter also lifts our mood, reduces blood pressure and strengthens our immune systems. Western science is just beginning to discover the many positive effects of laughter."

So, the good Dr. Kataria of Mumbai added a few yoga breathing exercises between bouts of laughter, and voila, 'Laughter Yoga' was born! Now there are Laughter Yoga groups all around the world. I googled it and found there is even a group here where I live. I've emailed the leader to see when they meet - so watch this space!

Try it ... throw your head back, and laugh out loud (maybe in a private place at first if you are a little shy). It works, and who knows, perhaps it might shed a few pounds too - or, you'll simply be too relaxed to worry about them!

Letter to my mother ...

Dear Mother,

As I write this you are living at the Interim Long Term Care Facility at the local hospital. You are there because at this stage of your life you need the extra care that they can give you, but I don't think you understand that. I visit you when I can. I know I used to come 3 or 4 times a week, but I just can't do that any more and I feel badly as I know you like me to be there. I can only come twice a week now because my visits drain the very life out of me. Leaving you I feel limp and useless.

You always had that effect on me. It was never easy for us to be in the same room, was it? Now when I visit, you cling to me as though you were clinging to life itself, and I'm sure it must feel like that to you. You cry, and you agonize because you want your life condition to be better.

Dementia is an ugly word.

Total dementia would be easier for you. But, life hasn't been that kind, it has given you partial dementia. Enough so you need 24 hour care, but you are often fully comprehending where you are and what is happening to you. That is why I feel so sad for you Mother.

Ray came to see you this morning, but you were not very pleasant to him. I expect you were mad that it wasn't me ... but I have visited twice this week and I still feel the effects of those visits. I will come on Monday after my yoga class. But, I cannot tell you that, because time has no meaning for you now.

The nurses tell me you are trying to manipulate me. Are you? It certainly wouldn't be the first time ...

Who would have thought that you would be leaning on me at the end of your life? Often when you hug me now, you whisper sorry, sorry. Are you saying you're sorry for crying? Or, is this a confessional sorry?

Does it even matter any more?

I'll do my best for you mother. But, I can't allow you to suck me dry. I need my essence, I need my spirit, I need my energy as I still have a lot of living to do, a lot of good times to experience with my wonderful husband, family and friends that surround me.

I wish our 61 years together had been different, but they were what they were.

And I will continue to do my best for you mother, I won't leave you. Don't cry any more.

To Plan, or Not to Plan ...

I think one of the best parts of a journey is the planning stage. Someone once said that the pleasure in a trip is 90% anticipation - I agree. So, I have been indulging myself on a mammoth scale recently, scouring the Internet for every little bit of information regarding our upcoming trip to India.

I'm obsessed! Firing off questions to the various travel site forums on the best places to stay, the best tour guides to hire, the best shops to buy silk etc. etc. etc.
Oh, I'm having SO much fun! IndiaMike.com and Trip Advisor have become my new best friends ... also Sonia in India who is handling our car and driver hire, and is firing back answers as quickly as I can send them. She's even invited Ray and I to stay at her home in Jaipur for the 3 nights we are there!

I started thinking of all the fun people miss when they book a standard tour, or place all this in the hands of a travel agency. Just pay your money and follow the lady with the yellow flag, don't question us, don't worry, don't think, you are in good hands with us ... I could NEVER join one of those groups. But I know they have a place, and I must admit that sometimes when I'm frustrated at finding just the right place - well, I can see they might have a certain appeal.

Then there are the travellers who never plan, who like to just 'wing-it'... they are mostly single (and likely to stay that way;) and often under 30 ... I don't fall into that category either, although I must say I rather envy their laissez-faire attitude.

No, I'm a planner, and it's the part of the journey I adore. I am constantly amazed at how generous people whom I've never met, and likely never will, are with their time and sharing of experiences. Like Paul, a professional photographer from California, who travelled with his wife to India 2 years ago, and whose answers and comments I came to enjoy on T.A.'s India forum. I felt we were on the same wavelength which waslater confirmed when he mentioned that he had spent a full year planning their 3 week Indian trip (now, there's a planner!) I read that he had written a 7 page account of their India trip which he'd be happy to forward to others if it would help them plan. This comment was 2 years old, but I took a chance and sent him a personal message (you can do that on Trip Advisor) and asked if he still had the 7 page epistle, and would he kindly forward it to me also? Well, he had, and he did! That began an interesting correspondence between us and even a phone call, with the result that my itinerary was further tweaked to include an overnight 6 hour train ride.

So, where are we going? Well, it's going to be fantastic ... we will sleep in a traditional tribal clay hut with thatched roof in Nawalgarh, stay with a vegetarian Indian family in Jaipur, sleep in a very old Maharaj Palace in Bundi, an Englishman's desert retreat house in Udaipur, travel overnight on a sleeper train, stay with my penpal in Pune, and sleep as close to the beach as we can get in Goa.

I am SO excited!!!!

Unfulfilled Dreams

Do you have a dream? Somewhere or something that has captured your imagination most of your life, yet try as you might you have not yet been able to fulfill?

My dream is India - in all it's glory, noise, confusion, squalor and majesty!

I took University courses in my 30's in Indian history and Indian religions, drinking up every drop of information presented (although my senior brain has forgotten a lot of it now!) I watched every movie I could that was based in India, every documentary, read non-fiction books on India and fiction based in India.

But life, as always, always seemed to get in the way of me living my dream, be it marriage, children, career, health issues, family commitments, husband's bad knees ... whatever, something else always took precedent. That was OK, I simply told myself that there was plenty of time, I knew I would go someday. Then last year I turned 60 ... what? How did that happen? I'm suddenly a senior? Where did all those years go? I need to start living my dreams NOW! But, hubby needed a knee replacement, so again I waited.

Knees now good as new, and we're finally going to India next January!!

It's a funny thing about India. Say the word and you instantly get two reactions. People either screw up their noses and look at you in total disbelief that you'd even consider going to such a place, or they get a serene half smile on their lips and start going into raptures of how much they adore India and recount long tales of their own travels there.

Yes, India is a dichotomy. Totally unexplainable.


It's home to over 1.2 billion people of wildly varying religions, cultures and levels of wealth. Only 63 years since declaring its Independence from English rule, modern India is still defining itself, sometimes against the friction inside and outside of its borders.

But,I've found a fantastic website at www.indiamike.com which is helping me prepare (as much as one can) since it's aimed at travelers to India - it's frank and offers very down-to-earth honest advice. For example, one article for virgin India visitors (like me) makes no bones about what my first impressions will be like:

"Your welcome to India is not a friendly one. The first thing you notice is the people. I mean lots of people. People moving in all directions. You have to deal with the worst of India head-on, and it’s really raw. Be it the beggars, the touts, the poor children, or the local taxi drivers, you have to deal with all of them minutes after your arrival.

Whatever tricks and tips you have prepared yourself with are forgotten in a matter of minutes after facing this rude welcome. It’s like learning to swim by reading a book, and then jumping right into the pool. India teaches you new lessons only after you have failed the test." (http://www.indiamike.com/india-articles/8_the-india-confusion)

This is the kind of thing first time visitors need to read, but as my daughter said after her first visit to India last year, "Mum, you think you are prepared for it all, but it still hits you over the head like a 2 by 4!"

Has this dampened my enthusiasm at all? Not one little bit. I know that visiting India is more of an experience than a vacation, but I think that I might just have an itinerary planned which would give us a bit of both - more about that in my next post. Stay tuned!